Gold Stars...

We have someone in our department who sends out a Gold Star email once a week in order to give a shout out to people who SHE believes did an exceptional job in some area.  It really is so much ridiculousness. 

In this line of work there is an extraordinary amount of behind the scenes stuff that goes on.  A senior officer who guides the rookie in how to properly handle a situation, a dispatcher who is multitasking like a fool in order to get officers the information they need, a supervisor who is setting a perimeter to make sure a bad guy doesnt slip through... All of these efforts are being supported by the cooperative efforts of others...We absolutely do not work in a vacuum.  I once received a Gold Star for giving a piece of information to the woman who sends these emails. I have rarely been so upset... No mention of the officers who did amazing things on the street that night, no mention of my teammates who did an exceptional job handling a very crazy shift, and no mention of the 40 minute conversation I had with a suicidal man..no, no...Her only interest lies in those things that benefit HER. So yes,  Gold Star emails really aggravate me. 

Additionally, we have awards such as Officer of the Year and Dispatcher of the year.  I don't agree with this concept and believe we should do away with these awards.  They exclude people who work their asses off and they highlight efforts of a select few who do NOT do anything on their own. 

I was named Dispatcher of the Year last night.  This upsets me.  

I don't want it to seem as though I'm not happy that people think I do a good job, I know that I do and I'm glad it's recognized.  But ya know what, some days I suck at this job.  Some days it's all I can do not to go freakin postal on callers, officers, and my coworkers. Some days I take a call that drops me to my knees and leave me crying outside the door and trying like hell to make myself go back inside.  On THOSE days....The people who deserve accolades are the people I work with.  The ones who are now handling my work load in addition to theirs.  A minute later it's my turn to do the same for them. 

We work this ridiculous, painful, hilarious, heartbreaking, scary, dangerous, exhilarating job every day.  And EVERY SINGLE DAY, EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US deserves a Gold Star...and most of those same days we each deserve to be fired :-)