Saturday, December 25, 2010

Happy Holidays!



...............................Merry Christmas!!!

.....................................


“Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love.”
~Hamilton Wright Mabi



Thursday, December 16, 2010

Change

My horoscope and life have run so parallel lately that it's just creepy! The most unnerving thing about it all though is the thought that I've been down this road before so why am I on it again? The likelihood that I didn't learn lessons is high and I find that really disturbing.

About 6 years ago I wrote a blog post that was basically me raging against everything that my life was about at that time. I was 27 and impetuous and I posted my feeling with wild abandon not considering the far reaching impact that it would have or how painful my rantings would be for those who loved me.

Looking back, so much of what I was unhappy about was not external but was within myself. I blamed the issues on my upbringing, my church, and my marriage. While much of what I was unhappy about had a great deal to do with these things, they were not the core issues. Of course at the time I couldn't see that.

THE core issue was that I was living my life the way I though others wanted me to live it rather than following the pathways that felt natural. Because of this I found my life to be flavorless, limiting, and rigid. To make a very long, very painful story short, that blog post was one of the steps that I took to what ended up being a divorce frome a man who was my highschool sweetheart, the loss of his family in my life, and the loss of many close friends.

In that post I vowed to stop living my life as a lie and start living each day in truth. I stayed true to that....but only for a while....


My horoscope recently has been several variations of the same message: "This is a time of great personal change. You become tired of your role in life, and you are very sensitive to habits, customs, and social requirements that hide the "real you". You feel as though you have been drifting along with the tide and following the crowd for too long, and your inner needs and motivations must assert themselves more strongly. You must break the habit of feeling as if you must live your life the way you always have."

The past 5 years have been the hardest of my life and while I finally feel as though I'm seeing the light at the end of the tunnel it makes me sad to know that many of the things that I raged against and set down 6 years ago I picked up again along the way.

I have fallen into patterns that I was determined not to repeat and I need to begin dealing with that. So in a way I have come full circle and while on the surface it's discouraging to feel like I haven't grown beyond that, when I take a step back, I realize that I have. I'm not trying to totally break out and change everything....6 years ago I threw away the entire life that I lived rather than just the issues that I had a problem with. I won't make that mistake again.

So what does all this mean? What are the "issues" that are bothering me? I'm still working them out but I think the short list is:



  • feeling like I'm entitled to make decisions that are good for me even if they may be uncomfortable for others

  • being unwilling to compromise over issues that I feel strongly about

  • being unwilling to take responsibility for the happiness of others


  • Sounds pretty simple doesn't it? We'll see.....


Tuesday, December 7, 2010

What a fantastic day!

It's been getting below freezing here for the past several days. I really needed to get some work done outside and today was the day...I cleaned up the yard, cleaned out the chiminea and worked in the garden.

My plan is to give the lasagna gardening method a try. I raked this year's soil and mulch smooth and sprinkled 2 huge bags of coffee grounds over the top. For anyone who isn't already aware - Starbucks gives away free bags of their spent espresso grounds! I covered that with several inches of fallen leaves and topped that off with wet newspaper. I poured liquid compost over the whole thing and put down several sheets of cardboard. We'll see how all that works!


As I was shifting things around found this little guy:






I also harvested a bunch of Rosemary and tried to insulate my herbs so they'll survive winter...fingers crossed!

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Love...



We found out a few weeks ago that Jake has cancer. We went through some sad days where he was feeling really poorly but he seems to have bounced back for the time being. This picture is so great because Lola has no tolerance for Jake...doesn't like him to be in her space AT ALL. But since he's been sick she is much more patient with him...I just think that's really special.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

I LOVE Felting!

I needed a cover to put a Kindle in and I had the idea to make one with felt…now that I’ve tried it I’m hooked!

I first knit a big stretchy piece on circular needles. You can see how large it is:


Then I threw it in the washer for 3 cycles and like magic...it felted! It shrunk, got really thick and isn't stretchy at all:



It was pretty cool to see the total change in texture…
here is an up close look at the knitting:
and here it is felted:


Once it was dry I cut off a small part to make a side flap and sewed some velcro onto the inside of it and on the outer edge. Then I added some vintage buttons and finally I needle felted a design onto it:

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Crazy Long Time...

I cannot believe how long it's been since I've posted here! To catch up...I'm still working as a Police/Fire Dispatcher and 9-1-1 Callltaker...




The garden did pretty well for me this year although I didn't get many tomatoes because the squirrels beat me to the punch!




I've kept myself out of trouble by working on some projects:
I finally finished this scarf for my brother...

A hat for John in the colors that he'd been wanting...

A winter set for the daughter of some friends...I'll have to post the hat soon - I just have to sew on the pom-pom...


I've acquired a few more drop spindles this year and I really wanted to make something to keep them safe so I came up with these tubes. Believe it or not these started out as USPS one rate boxes....

Friday, September 24, 2010

Sunrise

This morning John thought it would be nice to drive over to Lake Conway and watch the sun come up. We were both glad we went...it was a beautiful sight!















Saturday, August 21, 2010

The Natural Bridge

Today we went for a long drive and ended up at the Natural Bridge.


From the Arkansas State Parks Website:

Hidden away in the scenic beauty of the Ozarks, this 100-ft. sandstone formation was millions of years in the making. The stone archway was actually used as a bridge during pioneer days. Facilities include a log cabin museum and gift shop.


It really was fun... I adore that area! Everytime I drive up there I hit Damascus and feel this huge sense of relief and happiness...Someday I want a little cabin somewhere between Damascus and Leslie.

We've driven past the entrance to the bridge at least a half dozen times and never pulled in...I'm so glad that we finally did! The drive down the hill was incredibly steep with several very sharp curves and made me thankful that we just had the car in the shop!








Sunday, May 23, 2010

Optimism...

This is SO stinking cool!!!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

End Domestic Violence!

The hardest part of my job is the feeling of helplessness. You work as hard as you can do do a good job, get all the information and give all the support you can...BUT...you can only do so much on the phone.

Sometimes all I can do outside of work is try to raise awareness...A friend shared this on her Facebook page and I wanted to share it here:

While you SCREAM at your woman, there's a man wishing he could whisper softly in her ear.


While you HUMILIATE, OFFEND and INSULT her, there's a man flirting with her and reminding her how wonderful she is.

While you HURT your woman, there's a man wishing he could make love to her.

While you make your woman CRY, there's a man stealing smiles from her.

END DOMESTIC VIOLENCE!

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Volunteer!

Today John and I volunteered with the Special Olympics. It was so much fun and it really served as a reminder to quit whining about why you can't do something and just go do it!!! The people I met today face tremendous obstacles and yet still come out to compete with a smile on their face!










Thursday, March 25, 2010

Back to Life...Back to Reality...


John and I took off to Texas for Spring Break and had a fabulous time!!! I was sitting at home, glad that I had taken the time off of work so that I could spend his break with him, and hoping that we didn't squander the opportunity by just sitting around the house all week. Then...on the spur of the moment...I decided to suprise John, rent a mini van, load up the dogs, and head to Texas!

We stayed one night in Dallas and 2 nights in San Marcos...We saw the sights, shopped, ate at great local restaurants, shopped, laughed alot, relaxed, and shopped :o)

But alas...my time away from the salt mines is drawing to a close...and I return tomorrow....*Insert sobbing and tantrum throwing here* I am actually happy to be getting back to our normal routine...and it'll be great to see my friends at work again.

Then of course there is grocery shopping, taxes, laundry, yard work...... Hmmm...,may need to re-think that whole happy to get back to the normal routine.... ;)

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Today Is a Good Day!

Feeling so much better!!! I had a really good nights sleep and got a few personal issues lined out today!

Outside my window...When we had the big snow last week I bought a squirrel feeder and some bird feeders to keep the wildlife in my yard fed while their food was covered in about 8 inches of snow. Today I had such a good time watching a squirrel being a Greedy Gus! He would run and eat a bunch of corn and then run to the suet feeder and reach his little hand into it and grab a big bunch of seeds and suet. He would start eating it and at the same time was trying to reach through with the other hand and get more....which he couldn't really do without slipping...but he sure gave it a shot! LOL!

I am thinking...that I need to hit the gym this week! I joined like 2 weeks ago and have yet to go there....RIDICULOUS!!! If not weights then at least some cardio and tanning....

I am hearing...American Idol! I can't believe I've never watched this show before...so good!!!

Around the house....Clean rooms....clean smells...and CLEAN DOGS!!!!

A few plans for the rest of the week...Aside from work and the gym....I really need to do some grocery shopping. I picked up a copy of Clean Eating Magazine last week and I'd like to make a few of the recipes.

A picture to share...



This is what it looks like when I blog...Jake loves to lay his head on my computer anytime it's open...actually he likes to lay on top of the computer...but ya gotta draw the line somewhere :o)

Ummm....so yeah...awkward....that is indeed Duct Tape holding my computer together....I've been looking for a new one....I just get so attached...

Friday, February 12, 2010

Work...

So happy for a great day at work! They seem to be fewer and further in between these days and with our city's current economic crisis it seems that I may have more unhappy coworkers in the weeks to come. At this point I'm just extremely grateful to have a job. However, it does make me really consider my future plans....

Monday, February 8, 2010

Snowy Day!

Outside my window... I see my patio table covered with 6 inches of white fluffy snow!

I am thankful for... my cozy home...It's so nice to be able to relax with John and the dogs at the end of my day!

I am hearing... The over-actors on CSI Miami...and even though it's corny I like it!

I am considering...my future plans...school, work, etc.

One of my favorite things... Coffee that's ready for me at 5am! I love the automatic feature on my coffee pot!

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Trial Run

I've seen the Daybook approach to blogging on several other sites and I think I'm going to give it a try here. I get caught up in the mindset that everything I type on here needs to be profound....and let's be honest here...I'm not just overflowing with wisdom...that may explain why I never post! :o) Anyway...I'm not really blogging to enlighten anyone...I'm doing it as a way to highlight the events of my life and share a few pictures and thoughts along the way. So here goes:


Outside my window...it's dark and sleeting. The yard is tidy though since I cleaned up out there this morning. The dogs and rain have made a mess of the lawn and so I spread a bale of straw over it...Jake and Lola are not impressed!

I am thankful for... Everything. My attitude has been so yucky for a long time now and all of the sudden it's as though my eyes have been opened and I realize that I have absolutely nothing, not even the smallest thing, to complain about! There are so many people in this world who struggle...

From the kitchen... I made a great 15 Bean Soup with ham. Also made cornbread sticks in those cast iron pans that are shaped like a cob of corn. They're fun...and I like how crunchy they are.

Friday, January 1, 2010

2009

2009 was a crazy roller coaster ride that left me weak kneed and ready for terra firma! I didn't blog, I didn't cook, I didn't stay in touch with friends, I didn't exercise, I didn't read, I didn't do anything.....EXCEPT got a new job. '09 was a rough one for me... learning the new job and treading water in my personal took all I had in me....

BUT...it's 2010 and things are looking up :o)